Imagine being such a wimpy burglar that you can’t steal from a home because you lack the ability to move furniture.
The Polk County Sheriff’s Office took to their Facebook to report a bizarre series of events that began at a Dollar General in Poinciana, Florida. The store was burglarized in the early morning hours, and police identified a male suspect after reviewing security footage.
They were unsuccessful in locating the culprit, identified as Martin, but he was soon thrown in the back of a cruiser after police were called to an unoccupied residence. The door was unsecured when authorities arrived and they found their man — plus his lady friend — inside the home.
Police say the woman, who had called 911, confessed to breaking into the house.
“She said she called 911 for the purpose of having law enforcement assist her and Martin with moving their belongings from the house (the one they were burglarizing), and they were trying to get a ride to the airport, because they wanted to go to New York for the weekend,” the post read.
The post continued, “Deputies DID help them with their belongings, and DID give them a ride, but it wasn’t to the airport…it was to the Polk Pokey. And they are welcome to stay there all weekend long.”
The department cheekily ended the post, “The Polk Pokey is much better than New York anyway.”
They also included several hilarious hashtags in the post, including #NothingSaysRomanceLikeACoupleBurglingTogether.